Day 1 – I can still see
the sky…..
Recovering from an accident where broken, fractured bones have created so
much pain, I’ve had to regroup finding my “happy” self. For many weeks, dizziness
from head injuries kept me sort of “off-kilter”. I migrated from bed, around
the house, to recliner, to bed. I have watched more news and podcasts then then
the combined rest of my 74 years of life. My tiny dog and I have ongoing
one-sided conversations. Good news, he doesn’t talk much lol.
I am still reading my daily
devotionals and my Bible. Sometimes what I read touches my heart and soul and I
send up prayers of thankfulness. Other times, nothing resonates, and I have
moments where I search for verses that have some meaning for my current,
wounded body and soul. I claim those promises taking comfort in the fact that
one man who came to Jesus was very honest and said to Jesus, “I believe, help
thou my unbelief.” I also try, ‘counting my blessings.’
I have food, home, bed,
blankets, electricity, water, safe neighborhood, money to pay bills, some
family, friends, and can still see, walk, think and talk. I am truly blessed.
The above helps most times I am discouraged. Sometimes though, when I
keep hurting physically, or I am unable to do things, like open a bottle of
water, simple task yet requires being able to turn the lid. My right hand,
wrist and arm are injured and I can’t open water bottles, or a thousand other
tasks I could normally do. Then I have nagging thoughts, “Why God?” “What now?”
This moment, I am sitting in
my dining room, looking out the window at the clouds, the sky and the hills
some miles away. The sun is poking through the patches of blue and seeing that
makes me happy.
I’ve been
housebound for 7 weeks unless my kids could drive me. Yesterday, dizziness finally
gone, having the ability to have more use of my right thumb gave me the courage
to drive to my local stores. I bought a little food, and some pet care items.
It was such a big deal to me. The privilege to carefully get in my car, and
drive! Today I have a longer jaunt for physical therapy. I will take it oh so
slowly, (without becoming a road hazard, lol).
So back to the questions of; “Why God?, “What now?” I’m transparent with
God about how I’m feeling and thinking. When my own faith runs low, I just keep
reading the Bible and praying. I don’t know why, I don’t know what now, but
this I know, God is faithful.
Now, watching the trees are they are gently touched by
the sun and the breeze I feel blessed. My future plans list is pretty small,
along with my daily to-do list, but I’m still here. Moment by moment I will
continue on with the grace of God being the support through the times when the
future looks dim, and the present seems kind of hard.
I am claiming the following verse:
“Hope in God and I will yet praise Him for the help of
my countenance.”
Abridged: Psalm 42:11
