January 2-The ultimate encourager
MANY
OF MY CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN participated in sports. There was Little
League, Basketball, Football, Swimming and Track practices in seemingly
unending procession. Child after child learned that lesson that a coach was
someone who urged them to, “Try harder!” “Push yourself!” “Don’t be a
wimp!” The kids have had good coaches,
great coaches and not so great coaches. The not so great coaches tended to be
the ones that relied on put downs and public shaming.
A
good example of a not so good coach is aptly illustrated by the following
story. One late fall afternoon while my son Joseph was in High School, I can
remember waiting at school for my son’s basketball practice to get over. The
gym at the old Fort Vancouver School had a balcony where parents could wait and
watch practice. My son Joseph, a 6’7’
natural athlete loved basketball. He would shoot hoops in our back yard for
long periods of time, perfecting his shot. In that practice, on that day the
basketball coach decided to ridicule my son in front of his team mates. Waiting
in the balcony, it was all I could do from restraining myself from telling the
coach then and there what I thought of him, which wasn’t much at that point.
My son, highly intelligent, gifted,
sensitive, was horribly embarrassed and quit the team. No amount of encouraging
on my part could get him to go back. He had lost heart. This coach, intended to
be someone who built up the young men he worked with, instead with a few,
insensitive put downs had wounded the heart of a very capable player. Most of
us have had people in our own lives that have at some point in time, been those
same insensitive people who wounded our hearts with their attitudes, actions
and words. These people may have been parents, care givers, teachers, coaches,
bosses, co-workers; the list could go on and on. Any person, in any capacity
has the power to be an encourager or a discourager. The attitudes of heart,
mind and emotions they cultivate will determine who they are to others.
The
good news for us as humans is that God’s not that kind of God. Instead of
ridiculing us, putting us down when we fail at being “good”, or “noble” or any
of the other of dozens of admirable character traits we aspire to be, He is gentle, caring, compassionate and gives
us a way out of the shame and pain of failing. First and foremost, He, God sent
His Son Jesus Christ to pay the penalty for all our mistakes; past, present and
future. In a miraculous, unfathomable
sacrifice, He died on the cross to make a way for us to be reconciled, (made
right with) the Father, our Creator, God.
“For God so loved the
world that He gave His only, begotten son. That whoever believeth in Him should
not perish but have everlasting life.” John 3:16
How
can any of us fathom what that free gift is worth? Can we measure eternity? Can
we estimate the inestimable personal value of being free from guilt, free from
a sense of worthlessness due to our poor choices? Can we understand how to
value the priceless treasure of being able to come to God in prayer, knowing
and believing that He hears us, that he answers and that He cares? As each of us sets our course for the year
ahead, deciding what place we will give seeking after God, is a challenge we
all face.
. Note
to Self- Day 2- I will determine to
appreciate all the free gifts that are mine. Life, breath, thought, sight,
hearing, family and most importantly the fact that God loves me. I am blessed.
I will learn to thank God for His goodness to me for salvation, for comfort,
for strength, for provision, for purpose, for His sustaining power.
January
3- “Fool’s Gold”
AS A YOUNG CHILD I
had the privilege to grow up in the country. We had woods, and fields, and
rivers where I could play for hours. Building forts, exploring trails, fishing
for trout, I had a wonderful life. Sometimes, I would hunt for gold. In hills,
creeks, streams and rivers I would look for rocks bearing shining spots of
gold. Gathering my treasures to show my father I can still remember the
disappointment of him explaining to me about mica, or “fools gold.” For a brief
moment, I thought I was rich!!! It didn’t seem right that there could be
something that looked like gold, glittered like gold and yet was worthless.
In
life, the process of learning to sort through the worthwhile and the worthless
things is part and parcel of being human. Most of us has had the unpleasant
experience of having similar “fools
gold” moments. We’ve gone after relationships, careers, friendships that looked
ever so promising and proved to be ever so disappointing. Learning from these
mistakes will require that we take time to rethink ourselves. At this point,
some people stop cold and decide to adopt a fatalistic viewpoint; “What will be
will be.” “Whatever happens, happens.” “I’m just going to go with the
flow.” Others, become paralyzed by fear,
afraid to make difficult choices because what they’ve tried has failed
miserably.
Is there no hope out
of this quandary (dilemma, predicament, fix, jam, difficulty)? Are we doomed to
keep experiencing pain and suffering, pawns of fate and chance? Is there no way
to figure things out? More good news! God has provided us with a way of escape from
being hapless victims of the universe. Not only did He provide His Son as our
Savior to reconcile (re-unite) us with Him. He gave us a guide book, the Bible,
to help us sort out the questions of life.
Reading this guidebook, the Bible, will help
us while we are choosing what we value. What we value, creates the undergirding
of our life plan. Our beliefs will
determine the importance and significance of our attitudes, actions and
practices. Choosing carefully requires that we include in our planning the
process of thoughtfully considering the concepts of; good and evil, right and
wrong, eternal vs temporal (earthly), the existence of God vs nothingness.
Growing up, my mom
had a plaque on our kitchen wall, it read, “Only one life, will soon be past, only
what’s done for Christ will last.”
Facing this New Year with the belief that our lives and the things we do
(or don’t do) will impact others for eternity makes it very important that the
foundation of our plans rests on a firm foundation of truth.
As a young
grandmother raising three grandchildren I participated in the Head Start
program. It was a wonderful experience and as part of that experience I was
sent to Alaska as a representative. Anchorage in the winter was beautiful. In
between the conference schedule I explored. The Iditarod Dog sled teams were
assembling for their great trancontinetal race. In the park, elaborate, exquisite
ice sculptors had been created. The ice sculptors were enormous and lit by
ethereal lights. Intricate, amazingly executed they were there just for a few
moments of time before they would perish forever. We like those sculptors are here
for just a moment of time. If what we do impacts eternity how seriously should
we give thought to how we spend our days?
“Teach me to number my days so that I
will apply my heart unto wisdom.” Proverbs
. Note
to Self- Day 2- I will continue to
consider that I am created in the image of God. I will realize that through
Christ I have eternal life. I will seriously consider that what I do impacts
others, not only for now but forever. In light of this awareness I will
carefully, prayerfully choose what I give my time and heart to this coming
year.
January
4 – No Matter What
OCCASIONALLY, I FEEL GUILTY for
having such a blessed life. People who know me might think it odd that I
believe that. They can see: I never found my true love, (divorced), I never won
any beauty contests, (plain), I never did a lot of things. But, and this is
important, I NEVER in my life have gone hungry. I have NEVER had a life
threatening illness. I have NEVER lost a child to death. I have NEVER experienced
more than a couple of days of not having a place to live. And, most importantly
I have always had some sense that God was there, that He cared and wanted to
help me.
Oh, to be perfectly honest there
have been those times in my life when younger when something bad happened I
would cry and angrily accuse God with, “Why didn’t you stop this? You could
of!” I might pout, I might rant, I might rage because I was angry, hurt and of
so devastated. Eventually, I would come back to God and ask him to help me sort
things out. It has always comforted me to read the Psalms when I’m going
through trials of any kind. Not only do these Psalms talk about the tough
things of life, it also talks about the tough part of our reactions to the
pain. David was a real person who talked about feeling angry. He talked about
wanting God to kill the people who had threatening him, lied about him, hunted
him , and terrorized his tribe and family. He never sugar coated anything.
Later on in Scripture there is a
passage that states, “David was a man after God’s own heart.” If God liked,
loved David who was really transparent about hating his enemies that gives me
hope. Those times when I’ve found it impossible to love the people who’ve hurt
me I know that God can accept my humanness and still love me. Does that me
hating my enemies is the right thing to do? Does it mean we are supposed to not
only want God to take revenge but to take revenge ourselves? Well, no it
doesn’t.
What I’ve discovered is that I am
mellowing with age. As I continue to read my Bible, pray, ask others to pray
for me I am gaining a new perspective. I still experience the anger when
injustice is done. The pain is still there, but, and this is important, I take
to God in prayer more quickly. I pray for God to help me love this unlovely, or
these unlovely, individuals and to help me not to have bitterness, resentment
and revengeful thoughts. I continue to pray for those people, no matter what.
What I’ve seen that accomplish is that I reach a place of acceptance quicker. I
reach a place of peace sooner. And, (very important) whatever they’ve done to
me loses it’s power to wound me.
Before anyone starts thinking this
is just another version of “the power of positive thinking” let me clarify a
few things. 1. There can’t be anything between me and God. 2.There can’t be any
harboring of bad habits of mind, emotion or body. 3. I must filled with His
presence. (Holy Spirit) 4. You can’t
violate principles that are in the Bible. 5. You must be willing to be changed.
The above transformation doesn’t
happen automatically. It takes a willingness, a wanting to, a submission of
your will, and a commitment to seeking God. Is all this work worth it you might
ask? Yes, oh yes is my answer. I allows me the freedom to be free from
suffering from what other people do to me. It takes the “sting” out of the
actions. Through the power of the Holy Spirit I am able to “let it go” no
matter what.
. Note
to Self- Day 4- When stuff
happens to me, I will run to the anchor of my soul, God the Creator of the
whole world loves me and has promised to help me. “I will trust and not be
afraid, for Yah, the Lord, is my strength and song. He also has become my
salvation.” Isaiah 12:2”You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed
on You because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for in Yah, the
Lord, is everlasting strength. Isaiah 26:3-4
Day
5- Rediscovering Joy
SOMETIMES. LIFE CAN WEAR YOU DOWN.
War, sickness, poverty, bad marriages, wayward family members, oppressive work
situations, addictions, physical and
sexual abuse are only a partial list of situations that can seemingly go on
forever and wear your heart, mind, spirit and emotions down to a flat, painful,
survival mode. Millions of people are in that mode right now, it’s awful but
true. Possibly, you might be reading this and you are in that mode. The
painful, hurtful situation goes on and on. You’ve tried everything you know to
do to make it better. You’ve prayed, you’ve utilized every resource imaginable
and still the unpleasant, almost unbearable situation grinds on. I used to
describe this kind of situation to a pastor, “It feels like I’m hanging on to
life with my fingernails and at any time I could just slip and fall into the
pit.”
The trauma experienced by people who
go through awful life experiences impairs their ability to experience joy. They
can imagine what it might be like; they can fantasize that someday the
awfulness will end; but to experience it in the midst of the unending sorrow is
well nigh to impossible. Psychiatrists I’m sure have a word to describe this
prolonged exposure to trauma. In the battle zone, PTSD has gained recognition
of a condition veterans develop as a response to the horrors experienced in war
zones. I’m not sure if there’s another term for the prolonged exposure to
stress, (outside the war zone). The closest I can come is
“traumatization.” Life and people have
thrown a multitude of unpleasant, awful things at you, outside of your control,
and you are worn down, worn out, and weary. You pray, at least I have, for it
to be over.
I used to sing all the time. I wrote
songs, I performed them in church. Music was part of my life and response to
the joy I felt in the Lord. I wrote
about God bringing me through the fire, and saving me from the flood. I wrote
and sang about pleading with God to end the trials, acknowledging that He
chooses the proper time. And then I went into the fire again. Like the furnace
with Shadrack, Mesach and Abindego, it was heated seven times hotter. I stopped
singing. I didn’t stop believing, but the music departed from my soul. At times my excellent health faltered, and it
appeared I might be ill. I set my feet, I continued to pray and determined not
to quit. Things continued to go from bad to worse. I continued to pray, “God,
is it time? Can I choose another path?” I continue to get the answer, “Wait.”
And so I waited, but continued to wear down under the battle.
And then the door opened. I was free
from the situations. After several sighs of relief; thanks to God to bringing
me out I realized I am going to have to relearn how to have joy in my life. I’m
starting small. Helping my youngest clean while she recouped from a long bout
of being sick brought me some joy. It made me feel happy to see my grandchildren
smile at their rooms. Taking time to enjoy reading my Bible and morning
devotionals, that brings me joy. Waiting for family in the truck taking time to
appreciate the beauty of an outdoor light display, a small moment of joy.
After a long siege of troubling
circumstances you experience an emotional numbness. The healing process will
take a while. Trying not to accomplish too much, too soon I believe promotes
the healing. I am allowing myself to have some time to recoup, refresh and
heal.
With my hands in God’s, support of
family and friends I believe moment by moment I will rediscover my joy.
Learning to be patient with myself as I go through this process means I will
consciously be kind to myself. Later, after this respite time, perhaps I will
be better equipped to help others as they go through their own valley of
weeping to rediscover their joy.
“Thou
wilt show me the path of life, in thy presence in fullness of joy. Psalms
. Note
to Self- Day 5-I will recognize and allow
myself to heal from a negative, prolonged situation. I will be thankful that I
am “cast out, but not forsaken cast down, but not destroyed.”
Day 6-
