Day 92 And there was a calm....

Day 92 – And there was a calm…….

Whew! After several weeks of intense over-load at work, with over-flowing groups, too many lectures, and just way too many people to deal with effectively I’m beat. Today, I look out on the weekend with wistful eyes towards some kind of break, to refresh, renew, and rest. (Would that be r & r & r? LOL)

I’m still reading through the book of Luke in the Bible, trying to imbibe more of who Christ was into my mind and heart. Today, Chapter 8.  Of everything I read, the verse that stood out to me the most was verse 24. In this scene, the disciples and Jesus were in a boat crossing a lake or sea.  A storm came and the rain and wind and waves started filling the boat and they began to sink. Jesus had fallen asleep and was oblivious to their plight. Frantic they finally in desperation decided to wake him up.

 “And they came to him and said, ‘Jesus, we are dying! Don’t you care?’ And Jesus work up from his nap and spoke to the wind and the waves, and there was a calm.”

I love this phrase, and there was a calm.  I can’t help wanting this in my own life, a calm. When I was young, I loved hearing about the ‘eye of the storm’. It amazed me to see photos of hurricanes with that spot of calmness in them. It was weird and neat at the same time.

I am looking for that eye in the storm. A current phrase going round the treatment center I work at is this, you can’t change the wind but you can change the direction of your sail. Right now, working and reworking the figures of my finances I can’t quit work. Frankly, I’d like to. I eye boxes of fabric and think, “Hmm, I’d like to sew for a while.” I eye my paints and easel and think, “Hmm, I’d like to paint a couple of new pictures.” I look at my keyboard and piano and think, “Hmm, I’d like to write a new song.” But, I’m too tired now.

 I've never sailed, but what’s been explained to me is that if you use the wind and run against it you can gain speed and use it to propel you further where you want to go. Without wind, you’re in a calm where you’re stuck where you are. Well, me wanting a calm is wanting a respite from the grind, but perhaps if I look at it differently I can use these difficulties to gain strength for the journey. To ‘ride the winds of adversities’ so to speak to new horizons of life.

Hmm, sounds good on paper, but the fact of the matter is I’m with the disciples on this one and I’m praying, “Help Lord! Don’t you see I’m perishing? Make this go away!”

 In the mean while, I’m not quitting. I have family and myself to support and it would be idiotic to say, “Hmm this is hard, I think I’ll just give up.” Thank the good Lord that He has strengthened me to persevere, to stand fast, dig my feet in and keep plodding along. In the middle of all this work I continue to pray that with God’s help maybe I can contribute to somebodies recovery process. In the middle of the mountains of paperwork, there are people, struggling to even know how to survive without sticking a needle in their arm, or snorting some dope up their nose. The very basics of existing without drugs are an unknown to many of the men I work with.

So I pray, and ask my church to pray. I like the phrase, “little is much when God is in it.” I claim this. I am an aging, (right now tired) person. What can I do? Well, with God’s help, something. I can encourage, I can offer comfort, I can hold accountable, I can teach, I can share, I can pray. Only God, can bring the calm in the middle of the storm.

The most valuable thing I can do where I work is to consistently point men in the direction of their Creator. To encourage them to seek their Higher Power. To search their hearts, souls and minds to discover what they really believe about life, good and evil, and to ask themselves the question, “Do I need God in my life?”

We have church at the treatment center. And we have volunteer pastors who come in. Without telling people what to believe, I can encourage them to pray and ask God to help them. I can encourage them to attend church. And if they ask what do I believe, I can share with them about my faith.

So, right now, in the middle of the storm of my life and work, I cry out, “Jesus help!” If He chooses, He can bring a calm. If the storm continues, the promises are to give me the strength I need; to hold my right hand and see me safely through.

Today, I must get away to either the mountains or the sea. It’ll cost me about $30 in gas, but I have to go for my own mental health. If I don’t renew, I won’t be able to listen to the troubles of my clients with patience, and they so desperately need somebody to hear them. So, my day begins, Weight Watchers meeting, grocery shopping, and then a hop, skip and a jump to - I think the ocean. The salt-sea air I missed last week will this weekend be a bit more of a gale but my soul needs this wind of a new direction to brush away the cobwebs of my life.

To each of you reading this, may the comfort of the Bible be to you a sweet refuge in the midst of your own storm. Take time to get away and renew, Jesus did, and I believe it’s ok if occasionally we allow ourselves a reprieve of our own. And there was a calm…… may you each experience your own calm this weekend, be blessed.