Day 31 - Finding courage to stand in the gap

I can remember saying many times as a child, "I can't do it!" Learning to ride my bike, the tottering and tipping and falling resulted in multiple skinned knees and scraped elbows. All of these spills resulted in making me want to give up again and again on ever learning to ride my bike. I must have said, "I can't do it!" a couple hundred times until one day, the tottering lessened and finally I rode down the driveway without falling.


At Red Cross swim lessons, diving seemed impossible to me. Time after time I'd put my hands in position, try to bend my knees at the right angle and push off the dock, "Flop!" So many belly flops, the hard slap against my middle, the loud pop as I hit the water only to come struggling up with water clogging my nose. I hated seeing the amused smug looks of other swimmers who just couldn't believe I'd done it again. My swim teachers had their own frustration as they tired of hearing me say, "I can't do it!" over and over again.

My first piano teacher struggled week after week trying to teach me how to count. She'd set up her metronome while her large blue-eyed Persian cat watched from a safe distance. "One-e-and-a-two-e-and-a, one-e-and-a-two-e-and-a." She would use words, clapping, tapping, speaking all to no avail. I was never able to get the beat of a song unless I heard her play it first. I had what some people call, a mental block. I felt, "I just couldn't do it!"

  Later in life, that early frustration about difficulty in mastering a new skill translated into making me avoid people and situations who I found unplesant. If someone was rude, or annoying, or mean, I rarely confronted them with my issues. I found just cutting them out of my life worked a lot easier. It was quick, relatively painless, and avoided the whole drama routine. What I discovered is, the degree that people are annoying is the same degree they enjoy creating drama. The world and the people in it are not only their victims but their audience. Being either a victim or a hapless audience were things I just didn't enjoy so I walked away.

Right now in my life, my relationship to God is taking on more and more signficance. I am concentrating on trying to be more loving, and on being more responsible. As I try to learn, to change, to grow I am discovering that running away from problem people isn't always the best solution to building community. Sometimes I believe we are in a situation because we are the answer to the situation. Becoming part of the solution even when you know, in advance, there is going to be drama, requires courage and wisdom. For me I have to spend time in prayer looking at my own weaknesses and prejudices. What am I holding on to? What are my pre-conceived notions that might be clouding the issues? What is the wisest course of action?

Sometimes, unfortunately I let my emotions rule, and resulting chaos results. Sometimes, unfortunately, my intellect rules, and the true heart of the matter is missed. Learning, growing, and becoming more Christ-like involves submitting my motives to the scrutiny of prayer and Bible reading. Having wise friends to whom I can talk to helps also. Ultimately each of us are responsible for the action or inaction we take when it comes to life situations.

Recently, I had to pray and find courage to deal with a life situation. It was a situation where the right and wrong was very clear, but one where dealing with it was sure to create a lot of emotional drama. In many ways, walking away and letting it go would have been the easiest course. However, each person in their inmost self has to determine, "Is this something where I need to stand in the gap and stand up for what's right?" If that answer is yes, not dealing with it is not an option. The Catholic church has a lot of insight when they talk about sins of comission or ommision. This philosophy is based in part on the verse that says, "To him that knows to do right, but doesn't do it, that is sin." James 4:17

So recently I attempted to apply my heart to wisdom when I learned of a problem. First I listened the story of what had happened and made the determination not to over-react. Then I prayed about the situation and submitted it to God. I decided to sleep on it and woke up and prayed some more. Once I had an inner peace about the situation, I decided I needed to take action. I like the story of Joseph in the New Testament, it talks about the fact he was a just man, and when he found Mary was pregnant he wanted to deal with it privately. I agree with this philosophy. It's not always the best thing to create a big situation where everyone gets involved, and the mess gets bigger. Sometimes, it's the wisest course to try to deal with things privately.

With all these things in mind, I met with an individual who had the authority to address what had happened. I remained calm and stated the facts. I set up a time to find out the resolution of the issue, and I made a verbal comittment about the fact I would follow up on the issue. For many of you reading this, you may shake your head wondering what's the big deal? You face people and situations all the time and resolve problems. For me, it's been a long process where I'm trying to use the clear light of Scripture, the calmness of reason and the grounding of ethical concerns.

To do anything that impacts others in a way that might have some repercussions takes courage; finding that courage for me has involved claiming verses of the Bible that mention God's role in equipping us to fear not, but take courage.(Psalm 56: 3-4, Isaiah 41:10)  Finding what role God wants me to have in my day to day life has required me redefining responsibility, and following through on difficulties. It's not pleasant, it's not fun, but it's part of living in community, not isolation.

The church was created to be Christ's body on the earth after Jesus went to heaven. Because the church is made of people it's not perfect. There will be problems and issues continually. Learning to live in a community of a church requires being willing to stand steady when problems come and see things though. Being successful in life requires, standing steady and seeing things through. I am committed to be someone who no longer faces difficulty with the idea, "I can't do it!" No with God's help I will be a person who says, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philipians 4:13.  (including dealing with the unpleasant situations and people in my life.)

Today if you are facing mountains in your own life, take courage. God can give you the strength to face the trials, the courage to go through them and the love to triumph over them.